Of Changeling and Endings

I had a well deserved break this evening. Managed to cuddle up with Justin to watch a movie - Changeling. I don't know if I would recommend this movie to anyone... Because it didn't really have a happy ending. For me, when I watch a movie, the most important thing is the ending. Which is why even if the show is the most boring one on earth, I'll have to stick to the end to see what the "ending" is all about.

This movie, based on a true story, showed how determined a mother can be. Despite having all odds against her, she stuck through till the day she died.

If you've watched the movie, what I'm going to say should make more sense. At the end of the movie we both had one question "How can God watch all this and not inflict these monsters with fury from hell?" In the end Justin got an answer: He is God... and He knows their ending. God knows exactly how we're going to end our lives if we continue on our paths or shift paths midway.

Which brings me to the subject of 'endings'. Many times we do things without the "ending" in mind. Usually for younger people like myself (hehehe), youths, and children. The concept of "ending" seems hard to grasp. During childhood, we're roaming free, with subjective concepts being hard to grasp. Then at the age of 10 or so, we start looking up to teenagers, the supposed "cool" people, we aspire to one day "grow up" and for our lives to "start". Few short years later, we become teenagers, thinking that our life has begun when in actual fact it began the day you were conceived. So we go about fantasizing how life would be perfect if we didn't have parents nagging, didn't have rules to follow, and we were "grown up". Another few short years later, we become adults and we believe that by some stroke of magic when we turn 21, LIFE as we've planned and fantasized would finally start.... Only to be greeted by the harsh realities of life... that life isn't all that. Extra freedom = extra responsibilities. Extra money = extra bills. Extra room to make choices = extra room to fail miserably.

We wait our entire life for Life to start, only to find out (I hope sooner than later) that life is what we have now. Not in the past, not in the future.

I need to start living every "now" with the "ending" in mind. Because I never know when I'll reach the end. I don't want to be caught off guard and have to beg for mercy, for another day, another second, another chance.

Life is build upon every moment of "now" that we have. Choose your now's cautiously, for you never know when you'll run out of them. Every beginning has an end, do you know when your's will be?