The God shaped void

Reality therapist assert that there are five basic needs: survival, power/recognition, love & belonging, freedom, fun. Christians (actually Justin thought of it) would take Reality therapy and add another dimension - God.

Last night one of the discussion questions in cell was the feeding hands of God. Justin asked what we were all feeding on, no not food. But what was fun to us, what we went to when we felt like crap, what we were drawn to when we wanted to escape - those are exactly what we feed on. Then he went on to say that we all need God whether we like to admit or not, and the moment we're not feeding on God, we are feeding on something else. Think about it, why do we do the things we do? Are we all aimless mindless beings that wander through our lives being helplessly drawn to things that somehow give us 'pleasure'? To most people it may seem that way, test yourself by answering this question: Why do you do the things you do?

.
.
.
.
.
.

If you answered any of these:
because it is nice.
I dunno.
I just do it la.
Huh?
because la...

chances are you're not aware of yourself yet.

Fact is, human beings are intentional. What that means is that what ever we do is intentional, there is a purpose and meaning behind what we do and why we choose to do those things. So, if I am drawn to the television, after a bad day, all I want to do is to sit in front of the tele and watch. That's my fix, that's what I feed on and I do it because it provides a temporary relief from that bad sucky day. Temporary relief from the things we feel when that God shaped void is empty. Again, I said 'temporary'. Temporary because whether we like to admit or not, we all are born with a God shaped void, and no amount of fixes, can fix that empty crappy feeling you get at the end of a long hard day but God. Those who have tasted God's grace and goodness will know this. But a sad fact is, that it doesn't get any harder to run away from God after we've tasted His goodness.

One person once said, the love of God puts us in awe, but it is the same love of God that scares us. Of the many things in the world, people seem to shun God, run away from Him. Why? I have a few hypotheses, but shall not dive into it now.

This God shaped void is the cause of many a man's fears and uncertainties towards death. Not just because of the life-after-death drama; but there's just so many more tell tale signs,

the whole judgment of worth and value (what have I accomplished in my stay on earth? Will people forget me when I'm gone?),
judgment of meaning of life (so what is life really all about? 70 years on earth and then what?)
fears of losing loved ones (I will never see those I love again, will I be all alone?),
uncertainty (what will happen to the people I love when I'm gone?) etc.

We all have a God shaped void - the sooner we realise it's there the better. Why fight so hard? The very fact that you're fighting it, means you are acknowledging it exists, cause how can you fight something that doesn't exist?

You are searching for god, the idea of God in his essential being. You seek perfection and it lies in everything that happens to you - your suffering, your actions, your impulses are the mysteries under which God reveals himself to you. - Jean-Pierre de Caussade

What's your fix? What do you feed on? How long more are you going to feed on temporal things? Taste and see that the Lord is good... those who drink of Him will thirst and hunger no more.

Photography

As many of you know, my brother is currently into photography. This is one person who once determined, will go all out into the pursuit of his hobbies! His latest craze is photography. And I must say, is way healthier than his previous crazes like... ahem... anime... and ahem... comic books... But... that's only in my opinion lah. His skills have been improving by miles! And this year as belated birthday and Christmas presents (erm.. 2 years worth of birthday and Christmas presents to be exact), daddy bought him a Canon EOS 50-D. Too bad I wasn't there to see the silly smirk on his face he always has while he tries in vain to hide what's bursting to come out from within.

The upside of having a brother who is trying to master the art of photography is..... that he will need MODELS/subjects!!! Wahahahahahaha! We the family have been privilleged enough to be his photography subjects =D . It's a win-win situation! He gets to practice, and we get pictures!!

This CNY, more beautiful pictures were produced!

These are my favorite. He has more, shall wait for him to post it on his blog.

Online Shopping is Addictive!!

One of the great things about studying abroad was that I had my own credit card linked to my own account. Which meant, I managed my money entirely. No parents to interrogate me when the credit card bill of my supplementary card came. Nope. Nothing of that sort.

So the whole 100% personal credit card brought shopping to a whole new level! Kick started by my dad of course. See, my dad is a techie (serious techie), so one day, while chatting on MSN, he popped the question - Why don't you go buy yourself an ipod. O_O So what does one do when one's father offers the chance to purchase oneself a new ipod? TAKE THE OFFER LAH!!! So take the offer I did!! Muahahahaha! Dad found out that in Aussie, I was able to get a 20% student discount if I bought it directly from their website. I logged in, and that was my first internet purchase.

Then I wanted a proper case for the ipod, since the one I knitted just couldn't cushion it well enough. That's when I stumbled upon ebay. Heard of it previously but had never ventured into its deep dark realm. Long story short... I was hooked onto online shopping and ebay became my good friend. Sighs.

Took me a while to actually snap out of it. But when I did, THANK GOD!

It has been 4 years since I stepped foot into ebay. Last week, in his neverending quest of guitar perfection, the hubby dilligently browsed, researched, calculated, analyzed, browsed, researched, calculated, analyzed the web again and again for the best bargains on his Seymour Duncan Jazz Zebra neck pickup (yeah, heard so much bout it that I actually remember its full name). The result: A great steal from ebay.com. Since I already had an account with ebay, I did the purchasing for him... and that was it! The tightly sealed door to that dark realm was yanked open!! Since then I've been surfing online for online boutiques, beading supplies what not. =( but......Thank God! I've not made any purchases in these 2 days... there have been temptations... check that.... MANY temptations. But I'm still holding strong! Gosh, I'm going to need to get the hubby to change my password and keep it hidden from me!! Bahhhh.

Say No to Addictive online shopping! Tak Nak!

Fly Birdie Fly...

One of the pros/cons of working in a place such as homeschool, is the relationships built with people. People who somehow wiggle into your heart, find a place there, and never leave! Ever since stepping into the doors of Vineyard Resource as a supervisor in 2006, my life has changed - quite a bit actually. In 2007, I experienced my first "birds flying out of the nest" episode. Weird and foreign feelings filled me which I later identified as the "empty nest syndrome". Problem was, I was not a parent, certainly not their parents, neither were they my children. But still I felt this sore emptiness, kinda as though I had lost something.

Then in 2008, more birdies flew out of the nest. They had grown up, and outgrown homeschool. It was their time to take on the world! God knows the number of times I'd asked Him if I had done enough or well enough to guide, teach, and impact thier lives for the better. Understanding that I can only do so much, my comfort came from the knowledge that I had done my best. So which each departing student, I wonder if I had done my best.

Last night, two more birdies took flight - this time to Aussie. I guess I've learnt to deal with this sort of experience, so last night, in place of the sore emptiness, was a new emotion - excitement! I was exceedingly excited that Joseph and Mishie were now on their way to an adventure of their lives! New places, new faces, new experiences, new memories! Gosh, it made me miss the time when I was in Aussie. Last night was spent reminiscing the wonderful year in Aussie and a part of me was confident that it would be an even greater experience for them! =)

Desert Song

Sandra sent this song out for us to learn and practice for this Sunday's worship. I've been hooked to it since. Powerful song. I especially like the last verse. "I know I'm filled to be emptied again, the seed I've received I will sow

Desert Song (Lyrics)
Hillsong - This is Our God

VERSE 1

This is my prayer in the desert

When all that’s within me feels dry

This is my prayer in my hunger and need

My God is the God who provides

VERSE 2

This my prayer in the fire

In weakness or trial or pain

There is a faith proved of more worth than gold

So refine me Lord through the flame

CHORUS

I will bring praise I will bring praise

No weapon formed against me shall remain

I will rejoice I will declare

God is my victory and He is here

VERSE 3

This is my prayer in the battle

When triumph is still on its way

I am a conqueror and co-heir with Christ

So firm on His promise I’ll stand

BRIDGE

All of my life

In every season

You are still God

I have a reason to sing

I have a reason to worship

VERSE 4

This is my prayer in the harvest

When favour and providence flow

I know I’m filled to be emptied again

The seed I’ve received I will sow

P.S. I Love You...

I was told it was a must watch. So watch I did. And I have never cried through a movie before... Seriously, from beginning to end, piece upon piece of tissue... Times like these, I thank God for grace that allows Justin and I still to be together.

So hun, I Love You.

p.s. If you fancy movies about romance (not the chick flick kind, but the deep and real-meaning-of-love kind) watch P.S. I Love You. =)

Humor!!!!

It's been a while since something tickled my funny bone this much!!! Please check out Andy's aka Momojin latest blog post here. It was really really really funny!! And what's best is the profound meaning at the end. Wisdom + humor + truth all in one short blog post, bliss!!!

Thank you Andy for posting that up!

Brain Blips, Mishaps, and Feelings of Failure

I really love Proverbs 31 Ministry's daily devotions - Encouragement for today. Got another beautifully written one today and thought I should share this.

.Personal thoughts at the bottom.

Brain Blips, Mishaps, and Feelings of Failure

by Lysa TerKeurst

"Therefore everyone who hears these words of mine and puts them into practice is like a wise man who built his house on the rock. The rain came down, the streams rose, and the winds blew and beat against that house; yet it did not fall, because it had its foundation on the rock. But everyone who hears these words of mine and does not put them into practice is like a foolish man who built his house on sand. The rain came down, the streams rose, and the winds blew and beat against that house, and it fell with a great crash." Matthew: 7:24-27 (NIV)

Devotion:

Do you know what amazes me about those verses above? Both the person doing right and the person doing wrong experienced hard times. In both cases the rains came, the streams rose, and the wind blew and beat against the house.

Just because we're Christians living out God's principles for life, does not mean we won't face difficult circumstances. The difference being a Christian makes is how the difficulties affect us. If we are hearing and heeding God through our prayer time and reading His Word, then we will be able to stand strong in the storms of life. Our faith will not be shaken and our identity will not be rattled.

I once heard my pastor lament to my husband that sometimes he only feels as good as his last sermon. I can so closely identify with his comment because as a friend, wife, and mother, sometimes I only feel as good as my last interaction with someone close to me. A friend tells me I hurt her feelings and suddenly I feel like a bad friend. I forget to take the cookies I signed up to bring to the church nursery and suddenly I feel unreliable and disorganized. My husband asks me where his passport is, and when I can't find the file, suddenly I feel like a wife that can't be trusted.

The passport thing is still very fresh on my mind because it just happened recently. My normal reaction would have been to get frustrated, short tempered, and beat myself up while tearing the house apart looking for the missing passports.

But God's Spirit spoke to my heart and said, "Let me invade your natural flesh reaction. Call your husband and pray about the passports instead of getting frustrated."

So, Art and I prayed. I went from defining myself as a failure of a wife to being a praying woman who can face a hardship in a godly way. The frustration was diffused and we determined to look at this from God's perspective. If we find the passports, we'll praise God! If we don't find them, we'll see this as God's protection not to go on a planned trip later this month and we'll still praise God.

When hard times come and beat against our stability, we must be determined to hear God's words and put them into practice. Then nothing can topple our peace, security, or true identity.

Dear Lord, Thank You that my identity does not have to be determined by the circumstances of my life. Help me to hear Your Words, put them into practice and stand firm on Your truth. In Jesus' Name, Amen.

© 2009 by Lysa TerKeurst. All rights reserved.

Proverbs 31 Ministries

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There's been tonnes of times where I can totally identify with the phrase "I only feel as good as the last interaction". My darling hubs struggles to understand how I can be so inconsistent a lot of times. One morning, I'm dancing tip toed across the hall, but in the afternoon, I'm as grouchy as Oscar the Grouch on a mean grouchy day. The change is 180 degrees almost instantly! And I really don't like that. Some days, there's extra strength and I try hard to change my moods for the better. But other days, fatigue (physical, emotional, mental, and spiritual) gets me stuck in the rut for a long long time. Then poor hubs is at the receiving end of this. The same thing results each time - I feel horrible, like a monster of a person, weak and defeated.

Today's devotion reminded me that it will always be by HIS strength that I will be able to rise above mood swings and having my emotions and worth defined by my last interaction.

p.s. Thank God for a loving and very very patient husband =D

Role of A Christian Husband and Wife According To The Bible

Different But Equal

http://www.squidoo.com/happy-christian-family

God made Adam and Eve, not Adam and Steve. It's no mistake. We are made perfect. We perfectly compliment each other, for one is not without the other.

We are different. Only when we are different, can we COMPLIMENT each other. Different, not better or worse, just different.

But the sad truth is, we as man distorted what God has planned for us and sought to govern ourselves. Women want to be men and men want to be women. The wife wants the husband's role and the husband wants the wife's role.

There's an epidemic going on here. But we are surpressed. This is politically incorrect. Shouldn't women can do anything men can do? Isn't there equality? Shouldn't we choose our own roles?

The Beliefs Of Our World

There are really two domains in this world. The home and the marketplace. In our world, the marketplace obviously dominates. We spend twelve, fourteen hours working in the office. So when a wife was asked to build and take care of the home, it is often seen as a diminishing role.

Why can't I go out to work? Why can't I go to the marketplace to compete? Women can do anything men can do.

The role of building and taking care of the home is definitely NOT a diminishing role. It is a full time job in and by itself. In many ways, it is just as complex as the marketplace. There's your family's hygiene, nutrition, budgeting, finances, decorating your home and theology, etc.

The home, in the bible, is a place very much respected. Jesus said heaven is home to God and those who believe in him. The temple, in the old testament, is God's home. God lives in our body. The home is a place of honor.

When the woman forsake the home for the marketplace, she is really putting her family in danger. Having it all is a myth. God made us with a purpose and assigned us our roles.

When a woman takes care of her home, she is in minister. Serving God and loving the neighbor.

The Role Of The Woman

1 Titus 2:3-5 said "Likewise, teach the older women to be reverent in the way they live, not to be slanderers or addicted to much wine, but to teach what is good. Then they can train the younger women to love their husbands and children, to be self-controlled and pure, to be busy at home, to be kind, and to be subject to their husbands, so that no one will malign the word of God."

The woman is to be home oriented. As I have said, this is not a minor role. This is THE major role. Paul said the woman to build home and the man provide for the home through the participation of the marketplace.

In today's society though, the home is viewed very lowly. It is viewed as a place to sleep and eat so you can go back to the marketplace. Caring for a home is hard work, just as hard as going to the office, and satisfying, just as satisfying as being promoted.

A woman is by nature caring. Look at jobs that require high amount care, like nurses and counselors, isn't the majority women? Women just care more than man. They are more sensitive and more capable of love.

This is because women are made to be men's helpers. Genesis 2:20-22 said, "So the man gave names to all the livestock, the birds of the air and all the beasts of the field. But for Adam no suitable helper was found. So the Lord God caused the man to fall into deep sleep; and while he was sleeping, He took one of the man's ribs and closed up the place with flesh. Then God made a woman from the rib He had taken out of the man, and He brought her to the man." Helpers is again not a diminishing role. The Holy Spirit is described in the bible as our helper.

"Modern" women is always thinking, why should I be helper? I want to be the leader or equal. I want to be independent. This is a distorted view. Helper and leader is equal but different. The leader needs the helper and so does the helper need the leader. Women think this way today because we were taught pride is the highest virtue. Your self-esteem is the most important thing in the world. But the bible preaches humility is the highest virtue and love is the most important thing in the world.

A man NEED his wife to be dependent on him. It is very important for a man to feel important. This has nothing to do with self-esteem. This is him. Just like a woman need his husband to love her. That is her. We are all made to be dependent on each other and as a community.

The Man's Role

Ephesians 5:22-24 said, "Wives, submit to your husbands as to the Lord. For the husband is the head of the wife as Christ is the head of the church, his body, of which he is the Savior. Now as the church submits to Christ, so also wives should submit to their husbands in everything"

But also, Ephesians 5:25-28 said, "Husbands, love your wives just as Christ loved the church and gave him himself up for her to make her holy, cleansing her by the washing with the water through the word, and to present her to himself as a radiant church, without stain or wrinkles or any other blemish, but holy and blameless. In this same way, husbands ought to love their wives as their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself."

Man's role is undoubtedly the leader of the house. But we are not taught this, because it is politically incorrect. We were instead taught a distorted sense of equality. Have you heard of the 50/50 rule where the husband will do the chores for a day and the wife on another? Has man ever cared enough to clean? Even when he does clean, how clean is it? Has a man cared enough to take out the rubbish? No! Because men are not made like that.

Man is the spiritual leader of the house. In the old testament, when a woman commits adultery or sexual immorality, she is brought to her father's steps and stoned. Why the father's steps? Because she is his responsibility.

The man is also to go out to the marketplace and provide his family for "If anyone does not provide for his relatives, and especially for his immediate family, he has denied the faith and is worse than an unbeliever." 1 Timothy 5:8

Continuing, 1 Timothy 5:14 said, "So I counsel younger windows to marry to have children, to manage their homes and to give the enemy no opportunity for slander."

Man is the disciplinarian of the house. Ephesians 6:4 wrote, "Fathers, do not exasperate your children; instead, bring them up in the training and instruction of the Lord."

Welcoming 2009!!!

Wow. I'm sure you've been hearing tonnes of statements on how time flies, and how quickly the year passed etc. I somehow think there's a conspiracy or something. God may be secretly shortening the hours in our day!! XD

2008 is gone, and 2009 has begun. I've never been big at making resolutions... but this year something caught my mind. Taken from Crosswalk's Encouragement for Today. This about sums up my resolution. =)

A New Year's Prayer for You

Wendy Blight

"Pour out your heart like water before the face of the Lord."

Lamentations 2:19a (NKJV)

Devotion:

It's a new year. What is on your heart? What would you like to accomplish? What would you like to change? Have you made any New Year's Resolutions?

A few years ago, I gave up making New Year's Resolutions. I could never keep them. One year, instead of a resolution, I wrote a prayer. Throughout the year, I watched in amazement as God worked in my life and in the lives of others through my simple prayer.

Today, I would like to pray for you. Below is the prayer that the Lord put on my heart. As you read it, I invite you to use it as a model. Sit with the Lord and ask Him to help you personalize this prayer for you.

Father in heaven, thank You that You are Sovereign. Thank You that You know each precious woman reading this devotion. You planned for her to meet You here today. You created her heart. You know her every need, her deepest desires, and her open wounds. Lord, I ask that in this new year, You would fall afresh on her.

Father, You are Holy and call us to be Holy. Yet, we confess that so often our hearts wander from You, our speech does not glorify You, and our actions do not honor You. Soften our hearts to receive the words Your sweet Spirit has to speak to us. Clothe us with humility. Take away our desire to always be right and have our own way. Help us to seek Your Word in all that we say and do. Help us to submit to Your Word; allow it to penetrate those deep places in our hearts that resist change. If necessary, put us through the refiner's fire to burn off those things that keep us from walking in step with Your character.

Give us hearts that love and seek after Truth above all else. Give us wisdom and discernment to reject the lies of this world and the evil one. Guide us into all Truth. Guard our hearts and keep our eyes fixed on You. Grow in us those things that will make us more like You. As we study Your Word, fill us and saturate us with You!

Today, Father, we surrender our thoughts, our speech, and our hearts. Thank You that You are Faithful and True. We trust You will do a mighty work in us and through us this year and carry it on to completion until the day we step into eternity with You. Help us to trust in You with all our hearts and lean not on our own understanding. Help us to acknowledge You in all our ways so that we can hear Your voice as You say, "This is the way, walk in it."

Lord, we love You and thank You that You love us. May our lives be a living testimony of You. We ask this in the powerful and mighty name of Your Son, Jesus Christ our Lord who will do immeasurably more than we could ever ask or imagine. In Jesus' Name, Amen.

Related Resources:

Hidden Joy in a Dark Corner: The Transforming Power of God's Story (available February 2009) by Wendy Blight

Discerning the Voice of God by Priscilla Shirer

31 Days of Praise and 31 Days of Prayer by Ruth Myers

Application Steps:

As you write your prayer, is there an area of your life in which you consistently struggle? Would you be willing to give it over to God this year?

If you answered yes to this question, I invite you to surrender that area today. Boldly ask God to speak Truth into this area, no matter the cost. Ask Him to teach You His way, give you a mind to understand, and a heart to obey. Hold fast to what you hear so that your walk in that area will be established and ordered according to His will, not your own.

Reflections:

Spend time praying the prayer above or your own prayer aloud. Believe God that He IS able to answer your prayer. Watch expectantly for His answers. Thank Him every time You see His Hand at work. He will be faithful!

Power Verses:

Philippians 4:19, "And my God will meet all your needs according to His glorious riches in Christ Jesus." (NIV)

Ephesians 6:17-18, "Take the helmet of salvation, and the sword of the Spirit, which is the word of God; praying always with all prayer and supplication in the Spirit, being watchful to this end with all perseverance and supplication for the saints." (NKJV)

Mark 11:24, "Therefore I say to you, whatever things you ask when you pray, believe that you receive them, and you will have them." (NKJV)

© 2008 by Wendy Blight. All rights reserved.

Christmas!!! *phew*

Christmas was a BLAST! Thanks to all who labored continuously and unselfishly! *big clap and bow to you all!* The skit was a success! There were hiccups here and there, but based on feedback, it made a great impact! Thank You Jesus! All Glory be to Jesus!

Apart from preparing for the Christmas skit, I decided to try to cut cost this year while adding in a more personal touch to Christmas presents we'd give out. It's been eons since I baked cookies, and from memory, it included me slaving in the kitchen for a few whole days just for a few tins of cookies. So....... I decided to make cupcakes instead! This journey started a month back when I had to put my cup cake baking into practice, dad, mom, and the darling hubs were fed batches and batches of cupcakes.

First batch: too much coffee and too crumbly, didn't taste at all like cupcake - REJECTED!
Second batch: texture got better, no more coffee, experimented with icing for the first time and it was too dry and too sweet (250gs of icing sugar!! Madness) = REJECTED!
Third batch: just the right texture, just the right taste, icing was perfected but... they looked severely out of shape. My hypothesis was that I must've not cleaned my oven well enough, so there may have been bits of cupcake batter stuck in some corner of the oven so when the cupcake tin was rotating, the cup cake batter peeked out of the cup cake moulds to look, just like Malaysian drivers, viola.... lopsided cupcakes!! = REJECTED!
Fourth batch: by this time I was contemplating just buying cupcakes off the shelve. but they are soooo expensive compared to cost price. This time, everything turned out perfect! I added sprinkles, Hershey choco chips, and some grated white choco.... end product = PERFET!!!!!!!


Then came the even crazier part. (poor hubby can testify to this) I searched for gable boxes of the perfect size... too big = cup cakes may get bumped around, too small = can't fit cupcakes. There weren't any of the right size! So me being a craft fanatic, decided to make my own. Drafted my own template for the box and cupcake holders. Bought very beautiful double sided gold card stock, and there I went, tracing, cutting, and assembling... All this was done the day before Christmas. I thought I could finish it single handedly, but in the end, the poor hubby was dragged into it. And he never once complained, in fact, he was so sweet and cheered me up along the way, giving me shoulder rubs to reduce stress and hugs to calm the now messy-haired, frantic wife. (this is where you should go *awwwwwwww*, and guys, please learn this!) Result: 40 boxes of cupcakes (2 each), packed, decorated with ribbons, and tagged (personalized tags which the hubs had to print, cut, and label), and to bed we went at 1.30am.

All in all, it was amazing when we gave out the presents (mostly to those who helped in the skit), the look on people's faces when you hand them a present makes all the hard work pay off and stress melt away. =D I love giving gifts!!!!!!! Garghs!!!

This Christmas was indeed magical and blessed! Looking forward to Christmas in 2009!

on a side note, Thank you all who gave us presents! Thank you thank you!! And a special thanks to daddy for our new camera!!! Muahahahaha. I shall name her soon.

Christmas Props

We are 99% done with props!!! THANK GOD!!! So, now all that's left is a full rehearsal on Wednesday 9am -1pm. Please be there people!

I wish to thank God for His wonderful ideas and message... I know that this whole skit could've never came into being if it wasn't for Him. I just pray that we do Him proud and speak His word this Christmas!

I would also like to thank ALL THOSE WHO CAME AND HELPED!! You've made V2 your family, and have stuck with us through thick and thin, practices and props. I would really really like to thank you! It would've been easier standing on the sidelines, not get involved, and criticize. But you guys chose the harder path - to get on the boat and get involved. I am DEEPLY grateful and touched! We shall have a makan party later ok??? Celebrate!!!

So, 3 days to Christmas! Butterflies are finally growing in my tummy. Woooo EXCITEMENT!!!! This Christmas, V2 presents to you - No Vacancy. To God be the Glory!!

Christmas Props - Help needed

Hello hello!!

This is for all Vineyard people. If you are free this Saturday, Monday - Wednesday, PLEASE come to church at 9am - about 4pm. We need lots of help for Christmas skit props!!!
THANK YOU!!

To All Women Out There

Ever felt worthless, ashamed, belittled? Have you been filled with self-doubt? Do you find it hard to believe that anyone could actually be praising you, yet at the same time, longing so much for the slightest bit of recognition? Ever felt that there was nothing on earth you could do to make this better and how you wish you were never born? Have you ever felt ugly and unattractive? I have. I still do. This is something my dear friend May Anne sent me. It was at a perfect timing... God's way of telling me, "You're doing OK, my dear. And I'm still here." Hope this speaks to you too... Maybe it's God's way of telling you "You're doing OK, my dear. And I'm still here."

Every Woman is Beautiful

-author unknown (but God bless him/her for encouraging so many of us)

A little boy asked his mother "Why are you crying?"

"Because I'm a woman", she told him. "I don't understand," he said. His mum just hugged him and said, "And you never will....... "

Later the little boy asked his father, "Why does mother seem to cry for no reason?"
"All women cry for no reason" was all his dad could say.....

The little boy grew up and became a man, still wondering why women cry.

Finally he put in a call to GOD; when GOD got on the phone, the man said "GOD, why do women cry so easily?"

GOD said.... "When I made women she had to be special.
I made her shoulders strong enough to carry the weight of the world; yet, gentle enough to give comfort....

I gave her an inner strength to endure childbirth and the rejection that many times comes from her children......

I gave her a hardness that allows her to keep going when everyone else gives up and take care of her family through sickness and fatigue without complaining.......

I gave her the sensitivity to love her children under any and all circumstances, even when her child has hurt them very badly......

This same sensitivity helps her make a child's boo-boo feel better and shares in their teenagers anxieties and fears.......

I gave her strength to carry her husband through his faults and fashioned her from his rib to protect his heart.......

I gave her wisdom to know that a good husband never hurts his wife, but sometimes tests her strengths and her resolve to stand beside him unfalteringly.....

And finally, I gave her a tear to shed, This is hers exclusively to use whenever it is needed.

The beauty of a woman is not in the clothes she wears, the figure that she carries, or the way she combs her hair.

The beauty of a woman must be seen in her eyes, because that is the doorway to her heart, the place where love resides.

Lucky

I don't use the word lucky... always felt it was more appropriate to say blessed. But.... since the ball, I've been enchanted by this song.... Lucky - Jason Mraz feat. Colbie Caillat. Did it exist last december? Cause if it did, and I knew about it, I would've done a duet with Justin. sigh... too bad too bad.

.:.HELP Psych Annual Ball.:.

Last night was my first attending the ball not as a student of the faculty, rather as the wife of faculty staff. But it was certainly more happening than when I was a student. Organizing committee did a good job... but Justin and I were famished!! Dinner only started close to 9pm... Sigh. Malaysians and their HIGHLY rubber time.

The highlight of the evening was the one and only HELP Street Boys!! Starring lecturer of the Faculty of Psych and the HUBBY!!!!!!!!!!!! 98% of my focus was on him, leaving only 2% for the other lecturers. I've always loved listening to Justin play, but yesterday his playing was extra enchanting.. drools.

I spy a.... Gorgeous Couple! Muahahahahahaha!!!

Gosh!! I love this title!!! XD

Here are some pictures from the anniversary getaway.

* * *My favorite picture* * *

Update: I've highlighted my hair.
The hubs said: "Very nice!" and other sweet things that I shall not reveal.
Dad said: "Wah, nicest hairstyle since. Makes you look younger" Thanks dad. =D
Mom said: "Hm, not bad"

couldn't get nice pics of the hair tho... =/ But... Imma Lovin' it!!! Muahahahahhaa!!

Sher Dislikes Research.... Very much!!!

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As the title proclaimed.... i do not like research. But it is inevitable!! No research = no thesis = no graduation = no masters degree = 2 years + wasted = plain dumb. Sigh.... As part of thesis requirement, I have to define my topic, dig through tonnes of literature, decide on what I would like to research about, plan my research (while making sure I can defend every bit of my plan) <--- WORST part of research, write a proposal, submit it to the ethics review board, wait for their go ahead, actually carry out my plan, gather data, analyze data (this part I don't like), formulate conclusions, write a 20,000 word paper, and defend my research in front of many experts.

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I DO NOT like research!! I've started planning this since last year, and I thought I actually did a good job! But... after review it a year later, I realized lots of flaws! The biggest hit was when I realized the underlying structure of my proposal was really really far fetched and unrealistic. Time is running, and I'm stuck. I find a flow, and realize it won't work. So it's been like that for a while: find a flow -> follow it -> dead end -> back to the drawing board

Everything is still a blur.... God.... please help me! I want to graduate...

Bundaberg Rootbeer!!!!!!!!

Garghs!!!! BUNDABERG ROOTBEER!!!!! Cold storage had a clearance sale because they were expiring in 8 days. RM1.99/bottle (normal price approx. RM4.90)!! In short, RM1.99 for 375ml of heavenly beverage!!! After tasting Bundaberg, A&W rootbeer tasted too artificial and too sweet.

Try it! I heard the Ginger ale is nicer... but ginger ale has never been my thing. Perfectly content with BUNDABERG ROOTBEER!!!

One Year!

To celebrate one beautiful year together, we spent 2 days in Awana Genting... short I know, but we still had to work so... =) I've not felt so refreshed and stress-free for a long while (ever since we started Masters that is). So it was 2 days of no assignments, no datelines, no clients, no work, nothing but quality time with each other. Taking leisure walks with each other, reflecting on the year that was and planning for the year ahead. Guess I am more of an introvert than an extravert after all =D.

And for dinner, we ate at an amazing Italian restaurant, pricey, but worth every sen! The most amazing thing during dinner was the wine! I don't know much about wine, but I knew a sweet white would go well with my food, so I tembak-ed lah. And turns out the wine we got - Muscat, was 98% similar to our engagement wine!!! Nostalgia!! See, the wine we had for engagement was a present from Justin when we started courtship. In addition to the promise ring, he bought a bottle of Langmeil winter harvest Semillon , which I thoroughly loved. During the proposal, he sneakily had the waiter bring out that bottle, and so I knew that he was proposing! So 2 years later, on our first anniversary, the muscat was just so nostalgic! Justin bought us tickets to the Sydney next year (I AM VERY EXCITED!!!!!!!!), I am hoping that we'll be able to find that wine again! According to their website, it's sold out... =(

Ok, enough of booze. I think in a nut shell, this was how we celebrated our first year - slow, relaxed, easy, and stress-free! Just what both of us needed badly! In fact, we enjoyed ourselves so much that we're planning more trips for next year, starting with the first quarter! Gosh, I love my husband!!!